Have you found that it’s hard to make friends as an adult? It can be very hard as you get older to make friends. Why? Because you don’t have school and other activities that you did everyday, making you socialize with people your own age. We have jobs that are a somewhat similar situation to school, but at work it’s often a wide range of people of all ages spread out in different departments. Work is also a different atmosphere where you are probably somewhat busy and don’t have the time to socialize as much as in a school system. This is why it can be harder as an adult to make new friends.
When you are younger, your friends are often those around you on a daily basis which makes it easy to make and become friends pretty quickly. As we get older and move from different jobs and cities, it can be hard to make true friends that we really enjoy and want to keep around. Where do you find friends? How do we make true friends? How do you keep them after you find them? Below are all the answers you need to find your new besties.
Where do you Find Friends:
1. Meet Friends at Work
Meeting friends at work is one of the easiest ways to make friends. You are already forced to be at that office together working all day, chances are you’re going to meet a friend while you're there. Start going out for dinner or drinks after work and making plans on the weekends. If you can survive hanging out 40 hours a week and all the extra hours you spend outside of work, you know it’s a real friendship. If you aren’t ready for that, keep your work friends but also focus on finding friends for those out of work hours. It’s good to have both and that means more friends for you!
I'm sure we have all been those girls in the bathroom somehow making friends with each other while bonding in front of the mirror. You don’t have to be on that level to make friends but you do have to be social in this type of setting to make friends. Complimenting someone on their outfit is a good way to start a conversation. Also asking them what kind of drink they got because you are curious to try something similar is also a good conversation starter. If they are friendly back you can continue from there and invite them back to your table of friends. BAM you have friends!
3. Facebook Groups
There are soooo many groups on Facebook if you just look. I joined one specifically for new girls around the city that are looking for friends and it’s an easy way to start meeting people. A lot of times they will have a large social meet up where you won’t feel awkward meeting new people because it’s a bunch of new people all meeting each other at once. There are also groups for networking if you are looking to make friends that way, maybe you both have a business plan in common. There are groups if you want to meet new people while cleaning up your local nature preserve, groups for sports, groups for any hobby you have will likely be on there. You just have to look and you can find people that are similar and fun for your new girl group.
4. Friends of Friends
I went to Chicago to spend Halloween with some of my friends that moved there. They were also new to the area but had already met some new friends that they really liked. Throughout the night we got to know each other and all of a sudden the one girl was telling me about her cousin who had just moved to Charlotte and needed friends. It helps to know people because so many people move away from their hometown that there’s a chance someone will know someone that is also moving to your area. You already have a mutual friend in common so it might just work.
5. Gyms/Sports Centers
Meeting a friend in a workout class is very common. You can both complain about how terrible the class was after, just kidding. But this is a great place to meet friends because you already have something in common that you can talk about. There are plenty of places that offer different classes, activities, sports teams, ect. that you can join to meet people that have the same hobby as you.
There are friend apps now where you can have a bio of yourself and look at the bios of others to see if you have anything in common. This is a little more extreme than the Facebook groups, but you can also vet people a little more this way. Chances are, you also will have more than one thing in common if you can read their whole life story ahead of time. It’s a very “today” way of doing things but it will actually save you a lot of time if you are looking to meet someone soon and put in the time to make a friend. I took this advice from one of my friends that met her Chicago friend this way, and I’ve actually met one of my good friends this way too. Meet at a local place, as I hope you would anyway, and have fun getting dinner or drinks after a long day. It’ll be more fun than just going home after work, and if it’s not, just use your back up plan and say it’s been fun but you gotta go.
7. Social Events
Join your town’s “events” page on Facebook or Instagram and watch what’s going on around you. Summer is coming up and I’ve been seeing all the bar crawls being advertised that would be a fun outing to meet friends at. There are also concerts, fairs, festivals, ect., that are always being promoted because they want people to go. Be on the lookout for these events and either go alone if you are brave enough or bring one of those people from work you’ve been wanting to hangout with. Or if you have been talking to a few people from one of those Facebook groups, invite them all out. The more the merrier! If you are an introvert like me, it might seem like a lot to put yourself out there like this, but you won’t regret it after you finally have your “adult” girl group. Have fun with it and I hope you all tell me your success stories!
Part 2 Coming Soon!